LO<3E CoNFuSIOn

im in love with someone recently but i'm afraid that this breaks the relationship now as friends.
i'm afraid to loose that some one important in my life and as a friend. what if i just admit it, will it effect what ever we are in now? will it seperate us?
1 day without you sms-ing to me I feel there is something missing on that day...
i can't never talk to u you, not even for 1 day...don't ask me why cause i don't really have that answer.
some how now i want to tell you but when i face you, the words can never come out, it's stuck in my heart and it somehow hurts inside there somewhere somehow, i don't actually know what's going on with me nowadays, it's damn freaking complicated. i'm afraid you'l reject me if i tell you the truth about my feelings about you from the beggining when we 1st get along together well and until now...will you feel the same or you'll reject me and break my heart into a million pieces? but my heart has been broken before, if you break it another time it will take another person to fix it back for me cause i cant fix it back myself.
i don't know why i will fall in love again.
didn't expect this would happen again it's like history repeating itself...
maybe this time i can't take my pain in my heart anymore might leads me into another depression and will soon leads to a suicide...
what should i do with my complicated feelings bout you?

FALLing in love again???

omg...
i think im in love again...
shit...
im in love with one of my pet siblings...
this is a bad thing to do I know it..
what should I do???
should I just avoid meeting with em??
should i just forget about that relationship or should i just admit it to em that im in love with em...
man i cant understand my own heart what kind of person i am...
this sux till the max..
can anyone help me?
i wonder who?

Haiz!!!!*sigh*

now I don't know wether to be happy or sad.
1st, the sad part is im going away from subang(shifting to KL)
2nd, the happy part is my dad is going to buy me a motorbike(hopefully it will come through IF my mom doesn't get into the way)which i've been looking forward since when I was lil...(love motorbikes alot until now).
then next i'm going to shift some where near my college fren's house which I don't quite like it cause i don't actually like people to know where i stay(secretive).
but then, it is nearer to my college which i can sleep late and wake up a lil late compare to now...
haiz...
sad?happy?
don't know what to feel right now...
but all i can say is im in a stressful situation(studying for finals).

BaD Day Bad Tim3 Bad Mo0d

Big Big *SIGH*....
this few months sucks...
it all started month of december...
my dad hand me over his car because he went to china{dunno for what purpose}
so well i thought everything is going to be all right but i was wrong{big time}
accident in new years day...
just right after countdown...it was packed...it sucked{alot}
well it was already 1 somrthing in the morning im not going to hang around long just to wait for the traffic to be lessened{i was tired,sleepy and some how i really really wanted to take a bath,well it was packed of people n im sweaty why not}
then when i force my way out then out of sudden i felt the bang it was a big impact
i panic,i was thinking oh~shit im caught big time but my friend told me to run since that,that guy parked at the none parking side i was thinking if i full turned n reverse my car i will knock the car on my right{well i was kind sandwich that time} if i don i will knock the devider...then fine i just reverse then the accident happened...my friend keep on telling me just drive off...
well...i cant...the Mi Vi was infront if i move front i will knock em so the Mi Vi driver turned into my car park space{lucky he understands my situation}
then i just speed off with the dented bumper...{sheez...it sucked,new years}
fine, after a few day later, the tyre gave problem...{flat tyre,wow, 'i am so lucky'}
then after that when my college reopened i drove to college cause Lrt ppl sucks...{well some of them}
then after my class i saw the car was sprayed with black paint{the car was white}
i seriously can not take this anymore...
i'm at the edge of falling down...enough of trouble for once and now is only january...
how many more troubles i got to face?
i hate this guy who sprayed my car...
i want to haunt this guy down,dont care wether he's my friend or family i just want to kill him or make him suffer{anywhere he goes,anytime,anyday}if he has a family it will be more fun more easier to make this guy suffer...
i want him dead...
he caught me at the wrong time
i want a camera to catch this mother fucker